Memos are written so as to convey important messages to a person, or a group of people. These are made in the manner that all of our concers, queries, developments, etc. are relayed clearly and are usually delivered in a general manner. According to Purdue Owl (2008), these memos are written for different purposes. They can be written to send revised information to its employees, or may even address problems.
Overall, this memo contained all of the information needed to relay the important information to the employees. The problem was clearly stated, with the appropriate solution written before the memo ended. Specific details in this memo are to be changed so as to make it sound more formal and unoffensive. In the heading, instead of writing, “You are taking too long on your breaks”, one should write, “Having long breaks”. This makes the memo formal and positive in feeling. One should take into consideration that the general feeling of the memo should not be too personal; it should be generalized and should not use offensive words.
This memo should not have contained too much personal pronouns, such as “you” and “I”. At the same time, the warnings that were stipulated in the paper should have been written in a more professional manner. Anyone reading the memo would be intimidated by the words used by the writer. I suggest the use of more courteous words, at the same time make the memo have a feeling that the writer is accomodating and not intimidating. The use of run on sentences should also be avoided.
Perkins, Courtney. “Memo Writing.” January 3, 2008. The Owl At Purdue. 10 January 2008 <http://owl.english.purdue.edu>.